Santa Exists, Un!
by AkatsukiRedCloud
Summary: Christmas 2013 one-shot, SasoDei month. It's Deidara and Sasori's first Christmas together, and Sasori's surprised by the fact that Deidara still believes in Santa. Will the red-head let the blonde wake up with no presents from Santa? Or will he save Christmas for them both? Rated T for slight sexual themes and language. Please review! Merry Christmas! SasoDei.


_**Well, it's that time of year again^^ Christmas~! It's tradition for me to watch "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas" ever year. C:**_

_**I haven't submitted a lot for SasoDei month, have I? I'm really sorry about that; You can just blame my pure lack of motivation and unorganized personality for that^^"**_

_**Anyway, Here's my SasoDei Christmas oneshot for you all, I hope you enjoy!^^**_

* * *

_**Sasori's POV**_

I let out a yawn, stretching my limbs. 8:30pm, and I was already tired. "I'm going up." I announced, heading to the exit of the living-room.  
"But Danna!" My blonde roommate cried, sending me a glare. "It's Christmas Eve, you can't go to bed already!"  
"I'm about to show you an example on how I can." I replied, walking into the hallway.

My roommate, Deidara, was only young. The feminine male had turned 19 just a few months ago. The boy had ran away from home, and had nowhere to stay. It just so happened that my previous roommate had just moved out back then, and I was desperate for someone to share the rent. Lets just say I wasn't happy when the blonde showed up at my doorstep at 3 in the morning, announcing that he was going to move in. You should have seen my face when I found out he had no money to even help pay the rent.

Deidara had only told me this after about a week, when the rent was due. Over the few days of staying with me, he was a cocky, immature kid, with no manners what so ever. I was more than happy to kick him out. However, just as I was about to throw the toaster at the blonde, he broke down. His mask broke, and what was an annoying brat, ended up being just a scared little boy.

The blonde pulled on the heartstrings I didn't even know existed, and I gave in, letting him stay until he secured himself a job. However, over the weeks, Deidara had made a huge impact on me. I was a complete hermit. I hated life, and anyone who would try to intrude. He changed me though, for the better.

So that's how we had ended up living together. Our life had its ups, and definitely its downs, but we were happy.

I groaned as the blonde raced into the hallway, blocking the way to my room. "Deidara." I seethed. "Let me go to bed."  
"No!" The boy protested. "This is our first Christmas together, and I'm not letting you sleep through the whole thing!"  
"It's not even Christmas, brat." I bit back, crossing my arms.  
"But I know you would, un! You slept through your whole birthday!"  
"Best birthday ever." I smirked.

I could feel how frustrated the blonde was feeling, mainly due to the large pout he was putting on. "But we both need to put out milk and cookies for Santa..." He muttered, looking down.  
I quirked an eyebrow. "...Santa doesn't exi-  
"Don't you say that!" The blonde interrupted, attacking my mouth with his hand.  
"Et off ee!" I glared, pulling away from the blonde's grasp.

"Don't say such things about Santa, un." Deidara stated, sending me a death-glare. "He wont leave you any presents otherwise."  
"...This is your first Christmas without living with you parents, isn't it?" I asked, pursing my lips. The blonde nodded in reply, sending me a confused look.  
"Yeah, why...?"

Ah, of course.

I mentioned to you before, Deidara was very immature.

I'd make a great poet.

Sorry.

Anyway, yes. Deidara was very immature. So of course, his parents still managed to convince him that Santa actually existed. As this was the blonde's first Christmas without them, he'd get a shock when he finds out Santa hasn't come.

Remind me to buy a camera before I go to bed.

Should I tell him that Santa doesn't exist? Or should I just let him find out his own way? Many thoughts ran through my head at that moment, but before I could make that decision, I was being dragged into the kitchen.  
"Okay!" The blonde grinned, going through the cupboards. "Where are the cookies, un?" He asked, rummaging through our limited supply of food.  
"They're probably just going through my small intestine now..." I murmured.

"What was that?" Deidara asked, continuing his search.  
"O-Oh, nothing, nothing!" I smiled, waving my hand. "Why'd you need the cookies anyway?"  
"For Santa, of course. We need to show him how grateful we are."

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

I shook my head, attempting not to laugh. However, I failed. "Danna!" The blonde bellowed, turning his head. "This isn't funny! I bought those cookies especially for Santa, now where are they?"  
"I have no idea." I stated, putting on my best poker-face.

I actually felt a bit sorry for Deidara. His eyes were literally watering, and the poor kid had no idea where the cookies actually where.  
"N-Nevermind..." He sighed, eventually giving up. "At least we still have some milk le-

I paused mid-way through drinking a glass of milk. The last of the milk. What? Milk helped you grow, and I obviously hadn't had a lot of it in my past life. "D-Danna, un!" The brat screeched, falling over. I blinked, quickly slamming the glass down.  
"I-I had no idea, I swear." I frowned.  
"That milk was for Santa, and you knew it!"  
"There's still a bit left...?" I smiled, holding up the near-empty glass.  
"Like Santa's going to want your germs, un!"

I pouted slightly, earning a sigh from the blonde. "It's okay, it's okay...I'm sure he realizes what a naughty person you are judging by the letter you sent him...".  
"What letter...?" I frowned, tilting my head.  
Deidara blinked. "The letter you have to send him every year, telling him what you want. You did write him a letter, didn't you?"  
"...Does he accept texts instead?"

"How could you not send Santa a letter?" Deidara seethed, looking very close to strangling me. "You _have _to send Santa a letter, otherwise he wont know what you want!" I shrugged.

Glaring, Deidara dragged me into the living-room, throwing my onto the sofa. I stared up at the blonde with an alarmed expression.

_"Danna, un~" The blonde grinned, staring at me with a lustful expression. "Danna, I've been waiting for this moment for so long~!". I felt myself go red as he slowly lifted up his shirt, flexing his tanned stomach muscles as he did so. I couldn't help but let out a moan as he did this, desperately wanting to touch him. _

"Danna! Listen to me!"  
"Yeah...I could listen to you all day..." I murmured, still spaced out.  
"Don't take the piss, un!"

I snapped out of my thoughts, staring up at the blonde. "S-Sorry..." I muttered, turning slightly red.

These thoughts definitely weren't unusual for me anymore. I had them whenever the blonde got too close to me. I never bothered getting the thoughts checked out, just in case it was something embarrassing, like "Having-sexual-thoughts-about-brats-syndrome", or something like that.

Maybe I was dying?

"Danna. Write a letter to Santa, or I'll kill you right now."

Oh great. Now I had to write a letter to an imaginary fat guy, or I'd die.

Fun.

"I don't have any paper. Or a pen." I stated, staring up at the blonde.  
"Here." He replied, throwing the stationary at me.

I watched the blonde cautiously as I placed the paper on the coffee table, pulling the lid off the pen. "What exactly do I write?"  
"Greet him, un. Then tell him what you want, maybe work up a bit of a conversation." I nodded returning my gaze back to the paper.

Right.

"I'm going to get some more milk and cookies, un...I'll be back." The blonde stated, walking out of the room. I nodded, chewing on the end of the pen. Maybe I could just throw the paper in the bin, and tell him that I had already sent the letter to Santa.

"And I want proof that you actually wrote it!" I heard the blonde cry before slamming the door.

Periods.

_"Dear Santa, _

_I feel a bit silly writing to someone who doesn't exist, it's a bit like writing a letter to a brick wall, if you ask me. I just want to say, that you are a selfish, selfish man. _

_Millions of children (and annoying blonde brats) write to you every year, demanding overpriced toys, and other crap. However, we all know that these kid's parents are the ones that actually have to buy this crap, not you. You are a credit-stealing man, and you disgust me. _

_I'd also like to say that you are an even sicker man for employing creatures that you call "elfs". How dare you give people such names, just because of their lack of height. You also force them to work constantly, mainly just because they're so short, and you can easily boss them around. People like you make me sick. I'm tired of you tall fucks thinking you can boss us short people around. Go die. _

_You are a mean phony, Santa._

_I hate you._

_Die._

_You judge others, yet you only work once a year. _

_Go fuck yourself. _

_If you really exist, get blondie to kiss me._

_Lots of love and kisses, _

_Sasori. _

_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX"_

I smiled at my little masterpiece, folding the paper up. Ah yes, this would do perfectly.

* * *

_**Christmas morning, Sasori's POV**_

"Danna, un!"

I groaned, rolling over. Sleeeeep.

"Danna, wake up, un! Wake up, Santa came!"  
"Lemme sleep..." I grumbled, trying my best to ignore the annoying voice.  
"But you have to watch me open all my presents, un!"  
"No..."

The reason why I was so tired? I was up all night shopping. I arrived home at about 5 in the morning, after pushing through the monstrous hoards of last-minute shoppers, fighting to buy presents for their family and friends. The reason a humbug like me decided to go Christmas shopping? I was Santa.

Well, no, I wasn't. However, this year, I was Santa to Deidara. I couldn't hold the thought of the blonde waking up to no presents from the fat man in red. He'd probably blame me for writing such a crude letter (Which he thankfully didn't read...), and eating the cookies and milk. So I did what any amazing roommate would do, and spent all the little money he gets from his wealthy Grandmother every year.

Of course, I got the blonde a couple of presents from myself. Nothing special; Some clay, and a few fancy hair accessories. However, from "Santa", he got so much more. Spoiled brat.

I felt a lump lay next to me, only recognized as Deidara. Cracking an eye open, I layed my eyes on the excitable blonde.  
"It's Christmas, Danna..." He pouted, getting a bit too close to comfort.

_"Let's celebrate together, un~" He smirked, running his hands up my thighs, slipping them down the hem of my pants. I let out a stiff moan, closing my eyes.  
__"B-Brat~!" I chanted, a grin crossing my features. _

"I-It sure is..." I muttered, turning slightly red.  
"You have to open your presents too..." He smiled.  
I gave the blonde a confused look, tilting my head. "You didn't have to get me anything, brat...You know I don't like Christmas."  
Deidara grinned, shaking his head. "I got you some things, yes, but Santa left you some gifts too, un!"  
"H-He did...?"

Well.

Fuck.

I thought for a moment, suddenly realizing that Deidara had probably gotten a few things, and labelled them: "From Santa". However, I then began to think that the blonde wouldn't do such a thing, if he was so convinced that Santa existed.

Eventually getting me into the living room, I watched Deidara stare at the large pile of presents with shiny eyes. I then noticed that not all of the presents I had labelled "From Santa" were the ones that I had bought.

I paled slightly.

If I hadn't bought the presents, then who had?

"He even ate the cookies, and the milk!" Deidara called from the kitchen, sounding very pleased. I eyed the presents with high suspicion. Who could have done this? My eyes then trailed towards a small note, left on the arm of the sofa. Approaching the note, I picked the paper up, staring at the green, dainty handwriting.

_"Dear Sasori, _

_I received your letter, despite it being late. You've been a very naughty boy this year, as usual. However what you did for Deidara this year, was probably one of the nicest acts of kindness I've ever seen from you. So this is why this year I've decided to pay you a visit. _

_I hope you enjoy your gifts, I'm still trying to accomplish the on you asked me for in your letter. _

_Yours sincerely, _

_Santa Claus. _

_P.S- I appreciate the kisses you put in your letter."_

I couldn't stop my eye twitching after reading that letter. The handwriting was far too neat to be Deidara's, and I made sure the blonde was fast asleep before I left.

Very strange indeed.

"Danna!" Deidara called, exiting the kitchen. I jumped, quickly pocketing the note. "Danna, look what I found!"  
I raised my eyebrows at the blonde, who was holding some sort of suspicious plant, possibly weed. No, no, I made sure I always hid my stash nicely.

...That was a joke, by the way.

What the blonde was holding, was "mistletoe". I type of plant with forced complete strangers to slam their lips together, in a lazy attempt to actually get lucky at Christ-

Oh, Santa.

You dog.

I let out a gasp as the blonde literally sprinted over to me, grabbing hold of the back of my head. Within seconds, our lips had connected, and I was trapped in a deep, lustful kiss. I let out a moan as our lips danced against each other, the moment getting even more heated as each second passed by. Deidara's lips were soft, and perky. They felt nice against my chapped cold ones.

Eventually, we pulled away. I stared at the blonde with wide eyes, 99.99% sure I was bright red.

"Merry Christmas, Sasori-no-danna."

* * *

_Madara Uchiha smirked as he looked over the two new lovers.  
"Merry Christmas, boys." The long-haired man smirked, slinging the large sack over his shoulder, approaching his sleigh. _

* * *

**_Well that was cute? XD_**

**_Whoo~! Christmas in a few hours. :3 _**

**_I hope you all have a great Christmas, and enjoyed this little one-shot! _**

**_Love ARC. xxx_**

**_:D_**


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